The Referendum on Difference

Straight Guy,

I loved this Happy Times essay from yesterday's New York Times (thanks for the assist, DK). Give it a read.

Nothing particularly gay or straight about it, but it's all about difference, and that's what our site is about. The curiosity, longing, or relief to be found in difference.

Here's a favorite bit. It's about parents and their children, but substitute whatever you like. "They claim to be much happier and more fulfilled than ever before, even though they live in conditions of appalling filth and degradation, deprived of the most basic freedoms and dignity, and owe unquestioning obedience to a capricious and demented master."

--Gay Guy

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3 comments:

kathryn said...

It definitely strikes a nerve with everyone, in some way, shape or form. I'm constantly struggling with the decisions I've made...and that (sometimes) terrifying realization that there are no do-overs. Is there really anyone who's truly happy with the major life-choices they've made?
I mean, really??

September 20, 2009 at 1:02 PM
another gay gay said...

Hi,

Sorry that I've not been on the site for a while. Been traveling a lot for work. Sucks.

Anyway -- great essay in the Times.

I do think we compare ourselves with others and rethink our life choices through that lens, instead of taking stock on our own terms. I certainly do that.

I always get a laugh, as the essay writer alludes, that being single --especially gay and single--means that you are sexing up a storm. Sexual novelty every night!! Sure -- some gays are on that track. But, most gay single men I know go through long spells between sex and most gay couples I know hit that familiarity breeds sexual decline. Just like straight people, right?

September 21, 2009 at 1:39 PM
Straight Guy said...

Gay Guy and I were talking this through. I wouldn't change my life, though I do respond to a couple of "demented masters." Lights of my life.

I think that when gay people end up with kids, it's only after a long and thoughtful process. Straight folks, not ALWAYS so much. Not saying anyone's destined for happiness or trouble, either way.

Downside = filth. Upside = unlimited raisins and cheerios.

September 22, 2009 at 8:27 PM

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