Model Man

Straight Guy, Another reason to live. Next Top Model goes coed.
Straight Guy,

I had a laugh out loud moment this morning before you arrived at work.

The first step of my work day is switching out of my commuting shoes into the nice shoes that live under my desk. 

I tried to pull open the drawer where I stash the shoe horn. Locked. Huh? 

Eventually I remembered that I have my old laptop and a recent UPS delivery for you in my bottom drawer, so I had locked the desk. But my first thought was that I had locked up the shoe horn. That would be one valuable shoe horn. 

This was funny at the time, but I don't think it translates well to text.

--Gay Guy

Straight Guy,

Came home today from a great long weekend in Provincetown. 

I had an interesting interaction in the airport in Boston on the way home. I took the Ptown ferry back to the Boston airport. After going through airport security, I grabbed some lunch. The eatery was low on table space, and a guy asked if he could share the table with me. 

I knew I had seen him sometime today. Was it the Provincetown/Boston ferry?  

So, let's quickly jump ahead to the answer. No, decidedly not the ferry, but the US Airways screening line.

Here's the synopsis: Given that I'm a basically a friendly guy, had come off a long weekend of chatting with strangers in Ptown and that this guy and I were sitting two feet apart from each other, I struck up a little conversation. 

Me: I've seen you today. Were you on the ferry?
Him: No. I haven't been on a ferry in years.
Me: Okay.

Him: If I had been on the ferry, where we I have been coming from?
Me: Provincetown.

Him: No. No. I'm no homophobe but there's no reason for me to be in Provincetown.
Me: Okay, my bad.
Him: Yeah, I wasn't in Provincetown.
Me: Okay.

Buddy, it's great that you're straight. But, there's lots of reasons for straight people to be in Ptown. Like the best food on that part of Cape Cod. 

He did apologize for the remark. Hoped he hadn't offended me. I told it was fine--no harm, no foul. I wasn't offended, just weary that it required a drama.

SG, please, please remind me not to talk to strangers.

--Gay Guy

Recharge the Gay Battery

Straight Guy,

I'm in Boston, waiting for the ferry to Provincetown. Yes, the summer gay mecca, just not in the summer. It already feels like early fall, which it pretty much already is. No matter, I am not going to Ptown to work on my tan.

I need the down time. One of the many things that I love about Ptown is the opportunity to just be quiet. My head needs that right now.

Hoping for blogging time.

--Gay Guy

GG's Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda

Straight Guy,

Here's some of the news that happened over the past few months that I shoulda, woulda, coulda blogged about. Here's a few headlines. If you want details, call me. . . maybe.

  • Chick-fil-A head says gay marriage brings God's judgment. Cluck you, dude.
  • Green Lantern comes out as new gay DC comics character. You show me your gay superpower, I'll show you mine. 
  • Anderson Cooper comes out. Duh.
  • Target starts selling same-sex marriage greeting cards. This choice still has to be easier than finding the perfect Father's Day card.
  • Jimmie "J.J." Walker lets us all know that he's against gay marriage on "moral grounds." Not Dy-No-Mite, you big swisher.
  • Gay troops allowed to march in uniform in San Diego Pride Parade.  No snarky comment, just pride.
  • Astronaut Sally Ride dies, survived by female partner of 27 years. Again, nothing but pride.
  • Olympics. Hot bods, lotsa skin, lotsa Spandex. 'Nuf said.
  • Australian Olympic swimmer Ian Thorpe won't answer definitively if he is gay, but says he "ticks all the boxes." Uhmm . . . . okay . . . . got it.

Happy to be back on the blog with you, SG!

--Gay Guy

Tick, Tick, Tick...

Wait. What? Over the summer, when we targeted September 1 for a relaunch, we weren't smart enough to notice that the day fell on a Saturday of a 3-day weekend. Oops. 

Still, we're very excited. Maybe not as excited as this guy (see below), but pretty close. 

Talk to you Tuesday. 


Viral Video: Street Talk with The Beards

This could have gone a number of ways. Too bad they chose several of them. 

 -5 points for being way too long. 

+2 points for being Australian. 

--Straight Guy

When Only the Breast Will Do

Straight Guy,

I've been receiving some interesting mail these days. It's obvious that the marketers know nothing about me.

I don't know what I bought or where I bought it, but I am now receiving all kinds of baby-oriented mail. I'm now getting "BabyTalk" magazine. In case you've let your subscription lapse, this issue's content includes such relevant articles as: "Before picking your baby's name," "The peeps every mom needs," and "50 inspiring nursery ideas."

Lots of gay men and women adopt or find other ways of having kids, so the magazine could be relevant to some other gay man.

"BabyTalk" goes into the recycling bin, but I am holding on to a post card. It's a promo with coupon for a bottle for breastfeeding moms. "Your Baby Can Have the Breast, Even When You Are Away" it screams. On the back it bellows, "When Only the Breast Will Do."

I have nothing against this product. I just find it amusing that someone is trying to interest me in it.

At the other end of the spectrum. the Democratic National Committee sent me an email letting me know I can put my name on a NASCAR stock car at one of their rallies or hee haws. It's from the Obama for America campaign. Again, not for me.

SG, anythign interesting in your mail these days?

--Gay Guy

Gee Whiz: Freebird!

Gay Guy,

Yes, this thing plays music. Not for those who suffer from "stage fright." 

Billboard Magazine wins this month's synergy award.

(More GG/SG Gee Whiz entries can be found here.)

--Straight Guy

Source: BuzzFeed & B9

Viral Video: Don Loves Roger (Mad Men Remix)

Mad Men returned after an 18-month hiatus last night. Big numbers. Though not nearly as big as Straight Guy favorite, and AMC's other high- profile hit, The Walking Dead.

Yes, this is about two times too long. But it's a capable take on the man love that provides much of the Mad Men chemistry. Don loves women, but of course he also hates them. 

 --Straight Guy

Things Gay Guy Does Not Need to Do

Straight Guy,

I have a bucket list, but it does not include underwater rope jumping. Nor being surrounded by manatees. 

Not so Mr. Furman.  Read all about it.

Thoughts? Ambitions?

--Gay Guy

Vid: I'm a S-L-U-T

Straight Guy,

I've been laughing at Rush Limbaugh and the pickle he's in. Confirms my hope that sooner or later people catch on to how stupid things are. 

A friend passed this video along. 

--Gay Guy

Vid: Two Peeps, One Closet, Seven Minutes

Straight Guy,

I never went to any junior high school parties where kids played Seven Minutes in Heaven. Or Spin the Bottle. Come to think of it, I'm not sure that there were any junior high school parties. Hey, wait, do you think that maybe there were parties, but I just didn't get  . . . . . .  ? Mom! Mom!

SNL's Mike O'Brien proves that if you wait  long enough, everything comes back around.  He's got Seven Minutes in Heaven.

Some of the conversations are interesting, but content schmomtent, we're all here for the slow lean in that signals the end. Boys guests, too. The ending with Jason Sudekis in this clip is sweet.

--Gay Guy

Viral Video: Poor Peter

You think this video is about the explosive properties of nitrogen gas bubbles. 

It's actually about the current state of Peter's marriage. 

Emerson famously said "Men love to wonder, and that is the seed of science." Emerson didn't say anything about garage experiments and Peter's wife, who is probably right, by the way. But great scientists never simply do what they are told to do. Fight the good fight, Peter. 

 --Straight Guy

Gay/Straight Rorschach Test: Cabin


What do you see in this selection from the trending website Cabin Porn?

I noted that the resident was a rugged minimalist who owns four flannel shirts of the same design. 

Gay Guy saw hope in the detailing of the rug. 

How about you? Check out Cabin Porn. There's something for everyone.

--Straight Guy

I Wanna Dance with Somebody

Straight Guy,

I downloaded a few Whitney Houston songs today to add to my collection of exactly one. Whitney was great when I was not much in a pop culture place, so she's not much on my music radar screen.

For me, she's an example of someone with a wonderful voice who gave up control of that voice and her career to someone else. Ditto Celine Dione.

I wouldn't go so far as to say that Whitney is a gay icon. But we do love our dance music. And when Whitney sang happy dance music, nothing was better. Peace to you, lady.

--Gay Guy

Care for a Stretch?

Straight Guy,

I'm sorry that I've been such a shitty blogging partner this year. All I can say is that I am completely burnt out. Not burnt out on blogging. Just burnt out on life. A cluster of reasons: Winter blahs, work has been sucking the creativity and joy out of me, I stay up too late then feel tired all day. Blah, blah, blah.

I did find some energy in cleaning out the closets at home. And nothing like a new pair of shoes to cheer up this guy. Otherwise, just the same things over and over.

So instead of waiting to feel creative to inspire blogging, maybe I can blog to inspire creativity.

To de-stress and stretch myself, literally, I've been trying to get into a yoga routine.  Even with three yoga studios within sight of my front door, it's been harder than I thought. Harder to get a spot in class (I give new year's resolutions until Valentine's Day to perish) and harder than ever to do the work. 

Yoga is tough. Physically tough and hard to admit it. Men's flexibility pales in comparison to women's flexibility, that's well know. I don't care that I am less flexible than women, just that I'm less flexible than everyone. Maybe I need an all-men class. Here's a good Washington Post article about one man's yoga experience. Sounds scarily familiar.

Keep me honest on the stretching. And the blogging.

--Gay Guy

Gay Meets Straight: Madonna at the Superbowl

Gay Guy,

Our buddy Billy has hit the big time with a gig on Conan. He has his own Superbowl priorities.

I know that the programmers at PBS refused to delay airing an original episode of Downton Abbey, so you were unable to see the Superbowl. But did you catch the halftime show?

--Straight Guy

Gay Guy Needs a Hearing Test

I just walked by Straight Guy's office.

He told me that he was working on his filing cabinets. I heard that he was working on his fag habits.

I need a hearing test. But, it was the first time I've laughed at work for a while.

--Gay Guy

Gee Whiz: Mixed Emotions

Gay Guy,

Another entry into our Gee Whiz category, and this one has some controversy attached. [Link]

A private German Rolling Stones museum (ugh, of course) installed these urinals, apparently oblivious to the controversy that could ensue...

Critic: "Why does it have to be a woman's mouth? If it had been based on the emblem of the stones with the tongue, it would have been okay. But the tongue's been left out and they really look like women's mouths."

Owner: "That's not a man's mouth or a woman's mouth, that's art... They were damned expensive and they're staying where they are."

The owner was right about one thing: the expense. They cost 695 euros each! [Link]

What do you think, GG? Readers? Do you see the Stones logo? Homage or insult?

--Straight Guy

And Then This Happened: Hair Ring

 Slow week here at GG/SG. We leave you with this.


Ad Watch: Details, Details...

Click to Enlarge
Gay Guy,

I've added a bunch of stuff to the GayAdsStraightAds Tumblr. Some are funny European ads that I'd never seen before, and a dreadful ad promoting tourism in North Dakota. There's also a TV ad for the Renault Twingo -- with a nice twist.

The ad above is for the European lifestyle magazine Grazia which implies that a man can only be as attractive as his least stylish detail. There's another in the series on GayAdsStraightAds which diminishes dudes in fannypacks. 

--Straight Guy

Media Watch: Conan's Face and Ricky's Cleavage

Been There, Done That: Beard Punch

I've seen that look. Multiple times. 

When they tell you it's time to go. Let it go. 

--Straight Guy

Project Runway to the Rescue!

Straight Guy,

I have a pile of shirts demanding to be ironed, probably about 1.5 hours of ironing, staring me in the face (as in, I will have nothing to wear tomorrow). By a happy coincidence, on TV tonight is Project Runway All Stars. The perfect accompaniment--interesting enough to keep me at the ironing board, but not something that requires strict attention.

--Gay Guy

Caving In on "Man Caves"?

Straight Guy,

"Man Cave" made it to a 2012 list of words that should be banished. Sorry, I'm just the messenger. I'll buy you a bright light for your man cave of a dimly lit office. 

But, is "man cave" out as an overused word or is having a man cave out, too? 

I'm guilty, here. While my office is bright--perhaps to compensate for no windows--guests often call my my home lighting scheme "serene." This might be code for man cave. It's actually due to an odd placement of outlets. 

Readers, anyone else living or working in a (formerly known as a) man cave? Is there any kind of gay/straight, male/female trend?

--Gay Guy

Media Watch: Guys and/or/but Dolls

Gay Guy,

Tonight is the premier of "Work It," a new sitcom about guys in drag. 

The reviewer at the Washington Post nails this show and takes a thoughtful look at the history and controversy of men in drag on TV. [link]

Here's a quote: "In an unseemly display of uncredited closet-raiding, “Work It” is just “Bosom Buddies” with a smokier eye. ...bad drag is one of the oldest jokes around, and there is some debate about whether it works the way it used to, thanks mainly to the tireless efforts of professional drag queens, who’ve upped the game considerably, and proponents of transgender rights, who’ve had it with pop culture’s mockery and bias." 

I was young, but remember, somewhat fondly, the Tom Hanks sitcom "Bosom Buddies." I certainly remember that they cast a tall blonde stunner named Donna Dixon as Hank's love interest, probably just so there wouldn't be any confusion about sexual identity. Sorry that that was my biggest takeaway.

Actually, I'm more interested in HBO's launch of Angry Boys in which Aussie Chris Lilly playes all of the central roles, some in drag. Loved his last series, "Summer Heights High." 

The subject of men (especially straight men) in drag as comedy is too long to get into. I started to put together a short list, but wikipedia has already developed the killer content, from Chaplin to Madea. [link]

Anyone watching? Or just Netflixing "Tootsie"?

--Straight Guy

Gay Guy / Straight Guy Archive