"Share a Taste?": Gay/Straight Fork in the Road?

Straight Guy,

Will straight guys share a “taste” of dinner?

Last evening a friend and I had a fun dinner out. “How’s your food?” I asked. “Great,” she replied. “Do you want a taste?” she asked while easing her plate a few inches across the table toward me. I traded a fork of my tuna steak for a taste of her lamb.

“This is why eating with gay men is nice,” she said. “Straight men will never take a taste of any one else’s food.”

Straight Guy, does her observation ring true?

I’ve been thinking over my friend’s comment. I usually take a taste if offered. If I don’t remember to offer a taste, it’s usually because I am selfishly hogging my choice. I know I share “tastes” with female friends. And, last week I had dinner with a straight male friend and we traded a forkful each. But, I know that if I asked my dad if he wanted to try a taste of something I ordered, he’d look uncomfortable and decline. You and I don’t eat together much so that's not much help there. So, I’m stumped.

Readers, straight and gay. . . what’s your take on taking a taste? Leave a comment below and help me solve this savory question.

--Gay Guy


Anonymous said...

Hhhmmm. Never thought of this as a gay/straight thing, but . . . I almost never offer whatever I order, mostly because I never think of it, and if I do, I then am faced with the idea that my dinner companion may offer some of his/her meal, and I may not want what they have. And I do get uncomfortable if I'm offered a taste. This often may be that, like most people, I have my own food issues (don't eat pork, don't like skin/bones, eat beef and fish cooked medium well, have a shellfish allergy). I appreciate that someone enjoys a different dish than me, but I don't have to taste it.

I also think that most people end up order the same one or two dishes at restaurants they eat at frequently. They have found the dishes that most match their regular preferences, and if they want to try a new dish, then that means going to a different restaurant. Their dining companion may inevitably have different choices at those same restaurants.

Anonymous said...

I generally don't taste other peoples' food - I don't know why. I think I was raised to believe it was rude?


Gay Guy said...

I received an e-mail asking for a better description of sharing food.

To clarify: By taking a taste, I meant using your own fork to scoop up a morsel from your dinner companion's plate or having him/her transport it to your plate.

I did not mean eating from someone else fork or sharing it wedding cake style. I don't think I could do that at home; I know I couldn't do that in public. I would feel like the world suddenly was watching me.

David said...

Good God have I been a bad dinner companion? I wouldn't think twice about offering someone some of my food or accepting some of theirs. I actually get a little disappointed if someone orders the same thing I do. My friends and I don't just dig into each others dishes or anything but yeah, a little sharing always occurs before we really get into it. But now that I think of it, my guy friends and I don't do it unless it's finger food and then simply don't ask and just steal.

Gay Guy said...

No! You are a great dinner companion! The best. It's those other straight guys I am thinking about.

I, too, feel unimaginative when the other person orders the same thing. I feel like we should be more creative.

So, what is it about guys and finger food?

Straight in Upstate said...

I only share food with my wife, unless it's an appetizer with the "y'all dig in" invite. Mostly, my wife's the only person I eat with in restaurants, and precious few times lately at that. I meet one guy friend occasionally, but we always go to the same place and he always gets a burger 'cause his wife's vegetarian - I know what burgers taste like, and that's not a real sharing item.

But the real answer is: I always taste if it's something I'm interested in, regardless who offers, but I never offer. I'm self-centered and hungry. GG and I had lunch at Christmastime - did I offend by not offering?

Straight Guy said...

Let me make this simple:

Most straight guys order what they want (without concern for triangulating what the rest of the table is getting). Then they enjoy eating what they ordered and wonder why their dates are more interested in plates other than their own. Didn't they order what they wanted most?

I attribute much of this "tasting" among women and gay men as second guessing.

I'm usually happy to share, but your dining companion was right, GG. I have enough confidence in my choice that I don't need to confirm that choice by tasting everyone else's.

Anonymous said...

Hey Straight Guy: You can share without a "concern for triangulating." Once you take your shmancy terminology off it, sharing just means that you get to experience the appeal of more dishes than merely that ordered. When you think about it, the single entree focus is really counter-intuitive, straight guy behavior. I don't know a single SG, who doesn't (and not too secretly) pine to be born a Mormon (in the alcohol consuming sect, if there were one).

Just because you married the beef, doesn't mean you can't date the chicken . . .


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