Straight Guy Gift Guide, Day 2: Dress for Dinner Napkins

No need to hire an attractive model, it's for straight men! We're lazy, dirty, and have no style... plus food just keeps falling right out of our mouths. Ha. Ha. You got us. He's probably "adjusting" himself just out of frame, too. Thanks for representing, bro.

Buy them here. They also sell a keychain with the charming slogan: "OBEY YOUR WIFE!"

--Straight Guy

Gay Guy Here:

Straight Guy, you sound angry here. How do you know that this spoof is about straight men? Just because you are 90 percent or so of the male population? Was it the key chain?

I know I take a bunch of shots at you and your straight bros based solely on stereotypes. Okay, so I think there's a trend, but that doesn't mean that it's a lock. I know a few a gay men who fit the bib-wearing straight male stereotype.

Okay, that's a lie. I don't. But, I am sure they are out there. I've seen them. I just don't know any.

Look, you know me: I am a priss. A guy --straight or gay--who is, as you wrote, "lazy, dirty, with no style" plus table manner issues, would be a barrier for me. At the bare minimum I wouldn't be able to eat with him.

--Gay Guy

Just snarky, not angry.

No, not sure at all that the hairy model is straight. He is a model, after all. I just didn't think the joke was advanced by presenting a schlub in need of a makeover.

The online catalog filed this gift under "Men." But I think old ladies and little kids would love these things! Everyone I've shown has gotten a giggle out of them. Enjoy.

More stocking stuffers tomorrow. GG is very excited about an item that is marginally NSFW.



Straight Guy said...

Upstate, I tried to modify and republish this post and lost your comment, somehow. Absolutely unintentional. I/we greatly value all of your input.

Kathryn said...

I don't know...I think the marketing brains behind this product didn't think any further than "Find me an unshaven male between the ages of 35-40 and dress him in a Hanes t-shirt from K-Mart. Tell him we'll pay him in barbeque wings if he can hold still for all 4 photos." That's all I'm getting...

Gay Guy / Straight Guy Archive