Beer Test

Straight Guy,

Interesting report this morning: Four of our female friends went to a posh restaurant last evening. They are a mix of married and single women. They spied a handsome, pulled together gent a few tables over. Perhaps a connection for a single woman?

If I had been there, I would have applied my gaydar, but I was long home. They had a bit of back and forth on their conclusion about -- no gay vibe, then he was joined by a buff dude (gay). So, then what?

Their conclusion: straight. The evidence: He and his pal ordered beer with their dessert.

I agree with their conclusion and their detective work. Beer with dinner, sure. Beer with dessert, never.

--Gay Guy


Spot said...

Eeeew. Beer with dessert?! Not only not gay but no sense of taste whatsoever. What kind of dessert does beer compliment exactly?? I can't even imagine...


Brutalism said...

Because I have friends who are experts in this area (beer), I will have to respectfully disasgree with this assertion.

Many very good restaurants are now hiring beer "sommeliers" to help patrons pair the right beer with each course. (And many foodies admit that beer actually pairs better with a lot of food than wine does...even dessert.

Therefore, I do not know if this is a predictor of sexual orientation. Unless, of course, it was Miller which case, all bets are off.

Straight Guy said...

Beer IS dessert. So I'm not sure either.

Straight in Upstate said...

I love beer and fudge, and I don't know that that's governed by my preference for female genitalia over male. I totally agree with Brutalism - American lager doesn't go well with anything, but well-brewed ales, lagers, etc. have a huge array of tastes. A Belgian lembec (hope I'm spelling correctly) might go with a number of desserts, plus the disturbing trend toward raspberry beer, orange wheat beer, etc.

having said all that, if these two men ordered PBR and Twinkies, they were straight.

WannabeVirginia W. said...

Okay I am confused with the analogy he is not gay because he ordered beer with dessert? Help me out here!!

Gay Guy said...

Yes, WannabeVirgniaW. My analysis and instincts corroborates the conclusion drawn by my female friends. The man is straight.

A gay guy would not have a beer with dessert. Wine, dessert wine, a cocktail, a coffee or tea drink, yes. A beer, no.

A beer as a dessert, maybe. But a beer with a dish of tiramasu, very doubtful.

Beer with dessert = straight.

Can't tell you why. But, I know I am right.

WannabeVirginia W. said...

okay gotcha!

Kathryn said...

Huh. I was not aware that sexual orientation could be determined based on the beverage consumed with ones dessert.

Ya learn something new every day!

The Expatresse said...

Beer with ice cream, I could see. Don't ask me why.

But beer with tiramisu? That's just funny.

Gay Guy said...

Well, readers, this is exactly why this blog exists: so that I may educate you all about the hidden meanings of beverages.

I hope you all hear the self deprecating, dripping sarcasm of this comment. ;)

Gay Guy said...

Oh, and Straight in Upstate -- Right on with the scepticism on flavored beer. Raspberry, pumpkin. Ick and double ick.

I do like wheat beer, and don't mind when they float an orange slice in it.

But that's where I draw the line.

I do like beer. It's just hard on the waist.

BothWays said...

Great beer as/with dessert - a real beer float with Guinness. Delicious.

Gay Guy / Straight Guy Archive