Men's Intuition: Trouble Straight Ahead

Gay Guy,

I appreciate the support from you and our readers in response to last week's post on the current media cycle's indictment of straight guys. I realize that I don't need to apologize for the behavior of others... especially the cheating celebrities who create and exploit more opportunities for trouble than I could possible imagine in my own life.

Still, I was shocked that no one commented on what I thought was the most thought-provoking bit of info: The link to research that indicates that men have a strong ability to identify ovulating strippers based solely on visual cues. It's not that we consciously diagnose their reproductive status. But, whether we know it or not, we do tip them a hell of a lot more when they are at their most fertile. That's some primal magic at work, and I'm sure it was a valuable skill to a cro-magnon man on the prowl. But in the modern world, an instinctive attraction to the most impregnatable lap dancers is trouble... with a capital T.

No minds blown by that? Really?

Why is it that "women's intuition" is generally regarded as the ability sense danger and avoid it, while, apparently, "men's intuition" is the ability is to find trouble, walk right in, and pay a little extra for the privilege?

GG, you can never say that straight guys don't appreciate the subtleties of dance as an art form. We've taken it to whole new level.

Let me clarify a bit. When I say "we," I don't mean to imply that I'm a regular at the local Kitty Cat Club. Actually, in my limited experience in this area, I can say that I found the dancers pretty intimidating, actually, and that my strongest urge was often wanting to wash my hands.

Still, I am slightly jealous that the experiments I volunteered for back in college involved sensors attached to my head while I solved tough math problems. Did I miss the sign-up sheet to be a bankrolled stripper tipper?

Rock on, University of New Mexico and the McNair Scholars Program! Keep makin' your mommas proud!

P.S. I'd also like to see the tax returns where all of this research was deducted as a business expense.

--Straight Guy


Gay Guy said...

Nice photo. Are those your Christmas lights? Most people go with flying reindeer, but bring it on, friend.

Spot said...

I was pretty sure that was exactly what "men's intuition" was. No surprises there. =]


Anonymous said...

Is the drive to reproduce the species still that strong?

kathryn said...

I don't know what to make of's obviously an instinctual thing, as men would NEVER knowingly hook up with a stripper if he thought he was that close to creating life.

We simply have to hope that the stripper have their women's intuition up and running and that they run the other way!

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