Gay/Straight Grooming Alert: Beware the Clawz!

A Florida man has combined his career as a hairdresser with his fast-fingered piano technique and is now cutting hair with eight fingertip razors. (Link)

Valentino LoSauro now offers a cut entitled "Flight of the Bumblebee," and can finish in half the time as traditional barbers.

Still doubtful? Ritchie Sambora of Bon Jovi recently survived the "Clawz" process. What an endorsement. How can you not trust a middle-aged, semi-coherant, New Jersey hair band guitarist when it comes to issues of style and grooming?

Others who have undergone the process have left "stunned"... but I think Mr. LoSauro's wardrobe may also have been a factor in their bewilderment.

Most importantly, If this guy ever offers you any "manscaping" services, run for the hills.

--Straight Guy

12 comments:

Gavin said...

Ok....that's just wrong. o.0 I'll be sure to avoid such craziness next time I go out. XD

BosGuy said...

Um...no.

Oddyoddyo13 said...

Oh man! I don't know if I could sit in that chair.

Fierce said...

It takes great courage to even walk into his shop! I think, with my kind of courage, I'd avoid the entire block...
That is probably one of the scariest things I've ever seen o.0

Gropius said...

Oh that's crazy. My son would love it. We'll have to seek him out since after all, we live in the same state.

JD at I Do Things said...

I don't know that "stunned" is necessarily a positive reaction. I've been stunned after haircuts before . . . then went home and sobbed while hiding in my closet.

Gay Guy said...

This Liberace of the Locks is not getting close to my head.

When Pigs Fly said...

Just looking at that guy without the razors on his fingers scares me. I don't think I could sit still long enough to get my hair styled from him.

Straight in Upstate said...

I go to a female barber (who's a little scary in her own right) - I think she cuts my hair in 15 minutes. I don't think saving 7.5 minutes is worth visiting this guy.

Tinkerschnitzel said...

Yikes! Don't ever trust a hairdresser who has no sense of fashion!

Kathryn said...

Woah. I've got to tell you...when I first saw his photo, I thought that was a line of spittle running down his chin!

That frown of distaste never did truly leave my face, even after I realized it must be facial hair.

Maybe if you have really spiky, crazy, uneven, cobalt blue & purple hair to begin with? Then, I bet he'd do an excellent cut! And if not, who'd be any the wiser?

He looks like quite the character.

Dorn said...

I'm bewildered, yet not terrified. Does anyone remember the scene in Edward Scissor Hands where the qorked his magic on the whole neighborhood's hair? The extacy from Kathy Baker was excessive, but in all, it looked like a roller coaster ride for you hair. Hmmm, actually that last statement may have just settled it as a definite no go. Grooming/hygene should not be an extreme sport.

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