So Many Options, So Little Time

Gay Guy,

I've captured the two ads that Google keeps pushing on me today (see above). I think their demographics might be a little off. These ads were appearing in multiple feeds, so it must have been something I said, or searched for.

So I've been ID'd as a man of established success, with sugar daddy potential, but on death's doorstep. Has there ever been a more desirable combination?

Memo to Established Men copywriter: Kudos on packing maximum skank into a tiny wordcount. Extra points for using "girls." The commitment to ALL CAPS seals the deal.

--Straight Guy


Straight in Upstate said...

I've seen this ad in the past week but it just dawned on me - who's it aimed at? The successful man who apparently can't get laid on his own (those goiters will really hold a guy back), or the "beautiful girl" who yearns for a life of off-the-street prostitution?

Anonymous said...

I too have seen the "Established Men" (i.e. sugar daddy) ad before. It's clearly aimed at middle aged wealthy men (single or married) who wish to meet an attractive younger woman who is available for an affair. No where is any committement goal mentioned. The ad is clearly promoting that fact that they have access to a flock of women who are only interested in men with money.

Gay Guy said...

In the Established Men ad, it's the phrase "Sugar Daddy Dating" that kills me. I can understand a woman or man wanting to meet/date an 'established man,' in my book meaning grown up, on a career path, stable, drug- and nonsense-free. I know that's what I'm looking for and think I offer. Not perfect, just grown up.

And, the crown over the "E" in "established" is the icing on the cake. Who's wearing the crown: the daddy or the delight? Or is it the head of a penis?

Regarding Hugh Downs, I don't think any of us can take his turning up on our screen too personally.

But taking it over a hurdle into "sugar daddy"? Is there no location between Dude and financially/socially endowed?

Kathryn said...

Huh. Neither one of these ads shows up on MY google homepage...

Gay Guy said...


Guess this means that you are not looking for a sugar daddy. Can you cofirm or deny my suspicion?

Anonymous said...


I so want to be a Sugar Daddy, but this damn recession has taken away too much of my endowment!

I have the career, the loft, the age (45), the Cialis and Prevacid, no goiters, hell, I even already have the beautiful, intelligent, hot 27 year-old BOY/MAN Toy. I just need more cash!

Without the Sugar, I'm the Crystal-Lite Daddy!

PS: I always hope that you will be my Sugar Daddy. There is plenty of age difference for a May(me)-December(you) romance.

Gay Guy said...

Your endowment receding?!? Never!

Seems like you've got a lot behind you, including the American pharma industry. Who needs cash? You're just Splenda that way you are.

But, we do not have the potential for a May/December romance. I am not December. I'm the Summer Solstice of June. Okay, July. . . not a day past mid-August.

Gay Guy / Straight Guy Archive