Ad Watch: More Insults to My Manhood
Gay Guy,
Here's the latest web trailer for The Expendables, a macho-destructo-action-fest featuring an all-star lineup that includes Stallone, Schwarzenegger, Willis, Rourke, and a few others of lesser starpower and street cred.
They are billed as "the only men you're allowed to love." You OK with those options, GG?
Apparently, this flick opens opposite the Julia Roberts romance, Eat Pray Love. And, if The Expendables loses the box office tally, then I "don't deserve to be a man."
Sorry, Sly. Did you just try to shame me into dropping 10 bucks on your film? Is there anything LESS manly than a guilt trip? Get it together, dude.
--Straight Guy
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Hmmm, what's sad about the line up is that the "lessers" ie Jason Statham and Jet Li currently have more star power than the others. Sly, Arnold & Bruce only have flickers of fame now days yet they paved the way for all current action stars. Insulted man ego aside, they are playing to the common denominator in the form of a Tim Allen Grunt!
Can I get a discounted ticket if I show up with a copy of Maxim Magazine and an Ed Hardy trucker cap?
Oh, SG. You couldn't see me rolling my eyes...over and over. Now, I'm dizzy.
Give me a break! Altho having several of those star-power guys in one movie could be a potential hit, it's not a guarantee of success.
I swear...between this ad and the one about needing to donate an organ to get into the model's body, I'm starting to wonder what the hell's happening to the male psyche?? I'm feeling a definite downhill lean....
Was it just me, or was the music kind of...lacking in masculinity? Seemed kind of ironic, given what they're trying to promote.
Wait, the Governator made a movie? Hmmm. Is it an election year in CA?
Not my normal cup of tea, but I am compelled by the cast. How much did this cost? Ahnuld don't work for cheap. Or much at all.
The YouTube link was taken down (copyright complaint) but I saw the trailers on imdb.com. Dolph Lundgren is an action movie legend???? As are Terry Crews and Steve Austin???
Thanks, Upstate. I re-upped the link to this preview cut which has been disavowed as official. Hmmm...
Yes, the "legend" status is used quite loosely here. Dolph should be meeting with his finance team now to see how long he can stretch this payday out. There might never be another.
"The only men I am allowed to love." Hmmm . . . I was looking for something more "open" than that. Round up the two Fienes brothers and toss Daniel Day Lewis into the deal . . . and then we can talk about limiting my love options.
My straight brothers, I am all about sticking a finger into Julia Roberts' eye. Literally or figuratively. Eat, Pray, Snooze. But the Expendables looks like the fantasy of an 8 year old boy.
Sadly, Julia Roberts' brother is in this stinker and he gets lower billing than Dolph Lundgren - and Eric had more of a career, at one point.
Straight in Upstate rating: pick it out of the $1 DVD bin at the video store for when you're recovering from a vasectomy, hernia, or similar man-ailment.
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