Girls Gone Wild? OK . . . Guys Gone Wild? Gay.

Gay Guy,

Here's a story from the Canadian National Post.

A study, published in the Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, found that society accords men less "sexual latitude" than women, deeming it abnormal for a man to be disinterested in sex, to engage in homosexual fantasy, and to engage in submissive sexual acts.

"The double standard used to give men more sexual freedom than women, but these findings indicate that the dynamic is changing" said Alex McKay, research coordinator for the Sex Information and Education Council of Canada. "Men are forced to abide by a certain gender role, while women are today more free to be themselves. In this sense, the standard actually works against the man."

The Daily Beast takes the argument to the next level: Sluts vs. Losers. Check the link for male and female perspectives on whether it's tougher to be labeled as (a) the guy who's not getting any, or (b) the girl who gets too much.

So, GG, let me ask about one small part of this. Do you think it is easier to be sexually "out there" or just plain "out" for women these days?

I remember stumbling inarticulately around this many posts ago when Lindsay Lohan was coming out (or at least admitting that she currently had a girlfriend). Yes, she seems a confused mess in many ways, but why do I automatically assume that maybe she's just experimenting with her sexuality when I wouldn't grant the same latitude to a guy?

These are current social norms, right?: Dudes on spring break can get drunk and make fools of themselves. But they can't go "Guys Gone Wild" on each other and blame it on the alcohol, music, or plain old experimentation. But girls can, and do, because the double standard is accepted and encouraged. Girls don't face long-term consequences for their gay behavior, unless they take the GGW check and end up on video.

Yes. Yes. Yes. It's understood that many girls who go "wild" only do so for the benefit of straight guys. I get it, maybe we still objectify and ultimately control the dynamic. But even so, we've made it safer for curious girls to figure out who they are, and haven't given that freedom to guys who might really need to figure some stuff out.

So, I guess my prejudice agrees with the research. I try to be open-minded, so go easy on me as I admit to owning a stereotype: Girls can experiment with their sexuality and easily come back to being straight, but if a guy crosses the same line he's labeled as not-straight... forever.

--Straight Guy

Readers, click "comments" below to let us know if you agree, or to try and change my mind. See Gay Guy's response here.