You might look at this photo of the recent winner of the inaugural National Beard and Mustache Championships and see a man who has the drive and determination needed to achieve a tough, long-term goal. You might be right. [source: Mercury News]
But when I look, I also see a man who has completely given up... on getting laid.
He's been married for over 40 years, so that might not be his top concern. But, c'mon. Any ladies (or men) out there seriously tempted to grab hold of that thing and take a ride? Even if it was growing out of Ashton Kutcher?
His wife claims that it hasn't affected their intimacy, but also admits that they can't dance (metaphor alert!) without "impaling her eyeball." Given the fact that this guy loses almost an hour a day to maintain this abomination, I think we have a pretty good sense of where his priorities are. That's a lot of mirror time for a man.
I'm rarely clean-shaven and certainly not anti-stache. I support the good work that the "Movember" mustache folks do to raise money and awareness for men's health issues. Maybe GG and I will participate this fall with our own mustache contest.
But I think this guy is stretching the very definition of mustache -- most of that monstrosity is growing out of his cheeks. We might need a Rollie Fingers intervention and/or beatdown here.
GG is on vacation this week. San Francisco if you must know (or couldn't guess). I hope he's having a good time, and that I don't get another desperate, late-night, collect call from a Western Union office in Mission Bay like last time. Check his tweets (and SFPD's web site) for updates.
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