Things Straight Guy Hates Immediately: The Steve Buscemi Dress

Gay Guy,

I don't hate Steve Buscemi. I like him and his work. Dang, he was Mr. Pink in Reservoir Dogs! Randall in Monsters, Inc.! Ghost World! The list goes on and on.

I'll be kind about Mr. Buscemi's appearance and simply point out that the man is a character actor for a reason.

I understand the irony of putting a mug like that on a body hugging mini dress. (
How's a guy supposed to get turned on staring into giant Buscemi eyes?) Doesn't mean I have to like it.

Don't worry. Straight guys appreciate irony, we just can't think about too many things at once.

This is spun off a recent internet trend where photoshoppers pasted Buscemi eyes onto attractive faces. Ha. Ha. It's funny because they aren't pretty anymore. (OK, so I giggled at a couple of those, myself.) Anyway, the dress was created by edgy fashion house Black Milk, but just as it gained web notoriety, it's disappeared from their web catalog. Probably another victim of copyright enforcement, and now for completist Buscemi collectors, only.

Readers, if you are stuck on this sexy/notsexy/sexy theme and need a new idea, may I interest you in a zombie bikini?

--Straight Guy


Dorn said...

Teeth in the vaginal region is anything but inviting!

straight in upstate said...

Dorn stole my comment! Is this a comment on objectification? "Stare at my boobs, I'll put Steve Buscemi's face on them. Stare at my vagina, I'll put threatening zombie teeth on it." Then again, I tend to overthink a lot of things. But yeah, these would nip my sexist staring in the bud.

Norm Schrager said...

I don't think Steve Buscemi is too thrilled with these, either.

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