Hall of Badassery: Badass Rope Swing



Readers,

Thanks for your indulgence as I post a little more in this series. I'm noticing a trend: I get my thrills -- mostly vicariously -- through the defiance of gravity: jet packs, glider suits, antenna climbs, etc.

And now this guy, who takes the swimmin' hole rope swing and cranks it up to 11.

No need to watch the whole thing (though it looks great in fullscreen HD). It follows him sunrise to sunset and gets a little redundant. But still, sometimes I wish I could have a day like that.

GG, you may appreciate this guy on another aesthetic level. That's fine, too.

--Straight Guy

P.S. Trying to get back up to speed after the Thanksgiving break. Damn you, Tryptophan! We have a reader question and a few other cool posts in the queue.

Gay/Straight Cable Viewing

Straight Guy,

I hope you and yours had a good Thanksgiving. Did you make one of your famous pies?

It's a quiet Saturday night. I had some ambition to call a friend to see a movie, but it's chilly and dark, and I faded fast and opted for finding something on TV. Turns out that TV is in the gay/straight divide zone tonight.

The 9 p.m. movie line-up: The Wizard of Oz, A Star is Born, and Remember the Titans. The first two have strong gay followings. The third is a football movie -- on the surface. I chose Titans and now find myself in unfamiliar territory.

I know that the Wizard of Oz has a special place in the hearts of gay men, but don't really get into it. I'm happy to see it every now and again, but it doesn't speak to me. Wizard of Oz scores gay points for the "Over the Rainbow" theme: leaving your dusty suppressed life behind for a new technicolor universe where you can pursue finding what your heart truly desires. Plus tragic-victim Judy Garland. The paragraph on the film's appeal in LGBT culture in the Wikipedia entry does a great job of summing it up in a few sentences.

A couple of friends are totally into A Star is Born, and from that fact I may be making too large of a leap to make it a gay classic. I know very little about A Star is Born, other than it stars Judy Garland, features the killer song, "The Man That Got Away," and that the crucial line is, "Hello, everybody. This is Mrs. Norman Maine." Hmm . . . . maybe I know more about this than I suspected. There are three versions of Star. Judy Garland is in the 1954 version. Watch a fabulous period trailer for the film.

I'm enjoying Remember the Titans. It's a football movie, but it's really a movie about race and respect. I am a sucker for come-together-to-win-against-all-odds movies. The movie is based on the true story of the first integrated high school football when schools in Alexandria, Va., were integrated. The real fight is not on the field, but in the community. It's corny and a throat sweller, but good. The New York Times review nails it.

To retain my gay cred, let me hasten to mention that Titans had been on my radar screen if for no other reason than one of the leads is Kip Pardue, a hottie who starred in a movie called Loggerheads, which never built up much steam, but is really well written and acted. Read a review. I'll let Pardue's pics do the talking. Not really my type, but I can appreciate what he brings to the table.

Back to the Titans: The mother of the tragically injured team leader just left his hospital bedside and has entered the stadium for the crucial game to a standing ovation. Mercy, I'm all misty-eyed and useless now.

--Gay Guy

Fruit of the Loon: How Much Is Too Much?

My underwear drawer

Readers,

Today, in casual conversation, GG and I may have inadvertently stumbled upon another criterion to clearly define the gay-straight divide... or at least our personal divide.

Simply put, GG wears multiple pairs of underwear each and every day. I find this to be absolutely insane.

If he travels for a week, he takes 15 pairs, or more.

I can understand changing after a workout or strenuous interlude (ahem). But generally my undies last a full 24 hours (shower to shower) without complaint. I might pack an extra pair when I go on a trip, but not an extra pair for every day. No wonder he's always checking his luggage!

GG also admitted that he has other rules (black underwear can only be worn at night!), but I'll let him preach that gospel if he's willing. I agree that it's wise to wear your least-tattered skivvies if you think you might get lucky, but beyond that...

As far as I know, GG is free of any major intestinal issues. If he had a problem of that kind, only then would I condone his 2-or-3-a-day habit.

I guess I should buy stock in Hanes and 2Xist. I really had NO idea this was happening.

Readers, one of us is crazy. Is it him or me?

--Straight Guy

Readers,

This all makes perfect sense, folks. Trust me.

Most days, I am a two-pair guy: one pair through my work out, a clean pair following my post-workout shower. Pretty simple. No gym, no change. With no gym today, I am on hour 14 of the same pair. No problem.

It's the gym that generates some of the underwear turnover. Don't even suggest "just flip your shorts inside out" after the work out, SG. Not gonna happen.

There would have to be something special going on to warrant more than one gentlemanly costume change a day. Maybe on the weekend.

Regarding the 15 minimum pair for a week-long trip: 1) If I were gone for a week, I'd probably find a washing machine mid-week. If it's my parent's or a friend's home, that's easy. (My mom sometimes wakes me up by coming into my room looking for some lights/darks to round out her load of laundry. If she wants my socks, go for it. If she's after whites, i.e. my underwear, I'll get out of bed just to plop them into the boiling bleach bath myself); 2) On vacations, I''ll plan for a laundromat run mid-week to cut down on the packing. You can learn a lot about a city through a laundromat. Anyhoo . . . I pack a day pair, an evening (post-transition-shower) pair, and one "get lucky" ("strenuous interlude" as you call it or, as I call it, "event-specific") pair for the week. And, yes, "get-lucky" is top-shelf 'roos.

Let's not forget that packing for a trip means making sure you've got a clean pair or two waiting for your return.

As far as black = night only, I figure it's self-explanatory, but the locker room proves otherwise.

What's a little neurotic here is the underwear case system. The good undies work their loose waist bands down to post-gym wear, which then heads to the door. At least they go into the trash. My mom dusted the house with my dad's excised briefs. Shock. Horror. Scarring.

--Gay Guy

Hip = Gay?

Straight Guy,

This fall has been brutal. Work's been tough. And I've been way over-committed with putting together an exhibit and opening reception. Nerve-wrecking, but it went really well.

I appreciate that you came to the event. Especially since you were one of maybe three straight men there. But you might be too cool.

A friend who has met you at least once, and who has heard lots about you, told me that you are so hip that she had to be reminded that you are straight. Was it your blazer? Was it your conversation about the creperies and museums of Paris?
Confusing, mais non?

--Gay Guy

Hall of Shame: Dishonoring the Medal of Honor

Gay Guy,

Conservative blogger Bryan Fischer (from the American Family Association) has a nit to pick with how we honor our bravest soldiers. The recent ceremony at the White House got him thinking...
This is just the eighth Medal of Honor awarded during our wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, and Sgt. Giunta is the only one who lived long enough to receive his medal in person.

But I have noticed a disturbing trend in the awarding of these medals, which few others seem to have recognized.

We have feminized the Medal of Honor.

According to Bill McGurn of the Wall Street Journal, every Medal of Honor awarded during these two conflicts has been awarded for saving life. Not one has been awarded for inflicting casualties on the enemy. Not one.

He then spins into a tortured argument about how Jesus was really an ass kicker, and concludes with this...
We rightly honor those who give up their lives to save their comrades. It’s about time we started also honoring those who kill bad guys.

Holy smokes.

If there's a nugget of truth in this, it's that it is obviously easier -- and more politically correct -- to honor those who risk themselves to save another. But when did that become the feminine thing to do?

No apologies are needed. There are a million reasons why it is easier to honor life savers than life takers. The simplicity of the vetting process probably being the largest. Trying to rank our most skilled killers -- cross referenced with a list of those who ONLY took out the baddest of the bad guys (yet another list) -- would not be a fun job.

I'd be reluctant to link to this garbage if the comments (many from vets and soldiers themselves) to his original post weren't just the right kind of medicine for this sick logic. But I also see he's posted two follow-ups where he claims that he's been misinterpreted (by blasphemers, of course) and that he's only seeking to honor those soldiers that successfully "take the hill."

--Straight Guy

GG/SG: Now In Our Fourth Year!

Gay Guy,

Can you believe it? More than 3 years and more than 600 posts. Congratulations, buddy.

Readers,

We are continually grateful for your readership, support, and participation. We don't always feel like writing, but knowing that you are out there helps us find the motivation. We've been busy traveling (SG went to the Florida Keys) and volunteering (GG organized a killer event), so it's been slower the last couple of weeks. But there's some good stuff coming down the pike.

Thank you.

We're always open, so let let us know if you have any story ideas or a question you'd like to see answered on the blog.

--Straight Guy

Straight Guy ('s personal) Hall of Shame: Pontiac Parisienne


Hello, Ladies. And other readers, of course.

Like my ride (circa 1985)? Thanks, Mom and Dad.

Yes, I took a girl to the prom in one of these. Sweet kid. She never complained. But I never got lucky. Not even in the "back back." And I'm referring to the rear-facing third row seat, you sickos.

--Straight Guy

Make Mine a Latte

Readers,

Sorry to be quiet here on the site. I was out some of last week at a conference, and SG is out this week spending some quality time with Mrs. Straight Guy.

I just received an e-mail from a former colleague whom I've not seen in years. He reminded me of this story. Our boss took us out to a holiday dinner. At the end of the evening, the waiter collected our coat check tags to get us our coats.

"What color is your coat?" he asked me.

"Cappuccino," I replied.

Not brown. Cappuccino. Gay.

Is it my fault that I know a lot about color?

My friend's wife is still laughing about it.

--Gay Guy

Gay Meets Straight: Sunday Night Smackdown


Readers,

Gay Guy is loving PBS's Masterpiece Mystery: Sherlock, a modern and internet-savvy take on Holmes and Watson.

Straight Guy is committed to AMC's The Walking Dead, a zombie epic inspired by Robert Kirkman's popular comic books.

Anyone watching either, or both? Both have been well received by the critics. Are you in the mood for witty repartee, or will "unnnhh... brains..." do?


Ad Watch: Son of a...

Readers,

Here's a page from a 1940's booklet of tips for housewives and mothers (see right):

Wow, that's passive aggressive.

And if the kid happens to enjoy lace or other fripperies, mom will have another set of issues to address. And she better be prepared to follow through with the wardrobe enhancements.

But, someone on the original post wondered if we could still use this technique in a way that might encourage today's lads to keep their pants pulled up. Maybe steal their street cred by sewing something frilly to the underwear that shows when kids let their waistlines droop.

Though not really an ad, this has been added to our Gay Ads | Straight Ads tumblr site. There are a whole bunch of new posts, including Miller Lite's "Man Up" campaign, a European gay adoption PSA, a biker gang dancing to Bieber, and a promo for a cologne called "Eau De Stade" -- yes, that's french for "Stadium Odor." Blech.

--Straight Guy

Candy Corn Cone

Straight Guy,

Gays are good at Halloween.


Here's a shot in my gayborhood from last night (we block off part of the street for revelry).

Top that, straight 'hoods!


BTW, I think that Candy Corn Cone would be a great drag name. For someone else, that is.

--Gay Guy

Gay Guy / Straight Guy Archive